Nigerian woman reveals why she hasn’t remarried since her divorce

Nigerian woman reveals why she hasn’t remarried since her divorce

A Nigerian woman, Seun Obajolu, has indexed the reasons she hasn’t remarried because her divorce.

In a facebook post on Thursday, October 23, the us-primarily based mental health care provider stated one of the predominant reasons she is hesitant about remarrying is her feel of obligation closer to her babies, adding that she is concerned approximately their emotional health and protection if a new guy enters their lifestyles.

whilst admitting that marriage is not a concern for her, she stated she could remarry if everything appears “right” for me and that i experience “safe”

She however introduced that the choice would be made along with her eyes, head and coronary heart intact and no longer simply on emotions by myself.

RE-MARRIAGE after divorce. a person asked me currently why I haven’t remarried given that my divorce, particularly on the grounds that my Ex had remarried now not lengthy after.. even hinting that “maybe i might had been the trouble”…. Wahala oooo,” she wrote.

And whilst i’m no longer right here to just accept or refute that i used to be the “hassle” or point accusatory palms…because a few years after, following series of retrospection. i’ve come to simply accept that when divorce takes place, it’s normally not from a “lone” incident but a gradual development of troubles which finally boils over and results in “those irreconcilable differences people often communicate approximately”.

In hindsight, as part of my restoration and taking off particularly taking some duty, i’ve delved into some areas wherein i would manage a few matters a touch bit in another way if that same state of affairs ever provided itself again. but that’s no longer the reason for this submit….

So why haven’t I remarried? Hmmmm I’d say likely the identical motive a lot of different ladies with infants who went via divorce as I did haven’t reamarried but… however I’ll speak for me , maybe one man or woman can relate.

And right here are some hints – I communicate my reality!

Nigerian girl well-knownshows why she hasnHealing takes time and is extraordinary for anyone. And in my view, i’ve constantly desired to heal to a degree in which I experience “solid” enough to undertaking into such a very existence converting scenario, another time.

Nigerian woman reveals why she hasn I wished TIME to REBUILD- contrary to a few opinion, now not all and sundry gets wealthy from divorce… some need to select up and rebuild pieces of their lives once more mainly if you now have infants for your care who’re depending on you. For me, I had to cross lower back to school so I should in addition boost in my selected profession route and be capable of earn more… NO- it was not to pepper all people as some insinuated

Nigerian girl exhibits why she hasnI am now a whole lot older and wiser so I genuinely have emerge as way extra strategic approximately whom I select to have as a existence partner… so yes, i’m pickier and this surely has impacted a number of my selections along the method.

Nigerian lady reveals why she hasnMy kiddies became my utmost priority- whilst some thing as “unlucky” as divorce came about. whilst it is probably “easier” for the man to transport on, it’s always not as smooth for the lady due to the fact come what may we redirect ALL to elevating the babies. You turn out to be more involved approximately how the infants turn out because in spite of everything, a baby who seems top is labeled as a baby of her father at the same time as the only who turns out the alternative method, is categorised her “mother’s infant” ….. SO sure, most of my gaze has been on my kiddies….

They became leading edge at maximum of my choice making… Now i am worried about their emotional wellness and protection if I do remarry, I fear about how to stability being a spouse to this new man in my lifestyles and mothering my infants so everybody feels loved with nobody feeling not noted

And here comes my largest war so far…

Nigerian lady exhibits why she hasn Marriage not became a priority- at the same time as I do LOVE the concept of Marriage, ACKNOWLEGDE and recognize that 2 HEADS would always BE better THAN ONE…..

I do have some cold toes about dabbling into marriage again. would I do it again if all seems “right” for me and that i experience “safe” enough? in reality…

however it might be a choice made with my eyes, head and heart intact and no longer simply on feelings by myself…

And if I surely in no way were given married once more, i’d be content and FULFILLED with my lifestyles on the quit

And here are some of the reasons I haven’t remarried after divorce. thanks for coming to my TedTalk.